You see it everywhere... In magazines, on Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, while shopping, in books, on TV: How to be Confident: A Girls Guide to Success!, the #SelfLoveChallenge, body confidence campaigns, and the movie about an insecure girl who overcomes and falls in love with the boy of her dreams because of that newfound courage and confidence. The word and concept of confidence itself I feel is becoming drastically over talked about and overplayed, like a song on the radio that's been on repeat all summer. When did women get so insecure about every little thing about themselves? When did women become so dependent on men and other women for validation that they're beautiful or worth it? Why do some women feel this way? What happened... I remember one day in my sociology class last semester... My professor brought up the topic of makeup and expensive beautiful clothing, and why women feel the "need" to buy into it. He said "because women want to be told that they are beautiful." I was so completely thrown by this accusation and arrogant assumption he made! How ignorant of a conclusion to make about all of womankind! I wanted to fight back in outrage and say "NO. I don't buy and use makeup for my boyfriend to tell me 'hey you look nice today.' I don't splurge on clothes and expensive shoes and dresses for a stranger on the street to ask me 'OMG where did you get that outfit!' I didn't buy my very first Tiffany & Co. necklace for my friends to tell me 'Is that Tiffany's?!.'" I DO THOSE THINGS FOR MYSELF. Contrary to your belief Sir, but not all women feel the need for some sort of validation from the world that they are beautiful, pretty, or gorgeous. Because I already know that I am. I may have days where I look bloated and feel like a beached whale, we all do! But I don't need someone to tell me I'm still pretty regardless. Furthermore, I don't feel it's necessary for myself to analyze my own personality and mannerisms to mysteriously conclude by some made up questionnaire that I am confident. Confidence is not something to be measured, given, or awarded. Confidence is unspoken-quiet, yet not silent. I know that I am confident and comfortable in myself and who I am, but I do not feel the need to scream this to the heavens for all to know. And you shouldn't either. Instead I encourage you to seek a journey in exploring this idea of quiet confidence. A while back I wrote this excerpt portraying a mans view of a woman with this aura and dedication to living a life astray from needing the validation of others: "It wasn't the way she carried herself, or the eloquence with which she spoke. She didn't command the room for attention and she didn't dare have the audacity to gamble with arrogance. She wasn't quiet and she wasn't loud. Instead, her unspoken self presented the world with a symphony of gorgeous music whom simple ears could never comprehend. Her smile was enchanting, her laugh was delightful. She was a beauty to behold, fascinating and captivating. And with each twirl ensued as she danced about, she invaded your mind with rapid incurable curiosity. She danced with life in the shadows of the unknown with quiet confidence. And that was enough for you to become bewildered by her, body and soul." - c.e.e. |
AuthorI'm Claire, a fashion model and blogger who's deciding to take the path less traveled. Come adventure with me! Support the CauseDid you know that I'm attending school at College of Southern Maryland to obtain my Associates in Communications? Did you also know that I represent Smile Brilliant, Jord Watches, and Pura Vida Bracelets as a Brand Ambassador? If you make a purchase on these websites using these specific links or use my code at checkout, you're helping fund my education! All of the money I raise from representing these brands immediately goes towards anything I need for school: books, supplies, and even the classes themselves!
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December 2018
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